He's not 'Legs', now don't be abusin'
That royal tag, it's just not amusin'
To only get to wonder if they know even
'Legolas' is the name if they'd not simply pain him
He's no baby, he's no baby
'Legs' ain't all right
He's got hair down to his fanny
No dye or spray, it's every girl's fantasy
But call him 'Leggy'—he knows what to do
Don't wanna see that bow—he knows how to use it
Gruesome fate—he shoots straight
'Leggy's' for a fight
He's not 'Legs', so he'll be refusin'
His 'Leggy' fans—he knows how to choose them
They can pine, he's got time
Stays in at night, movin' through the mines
Cuz "I want him, said I got to have him!
"Gimli's all right, he's all right"
This is a work of fan fiction, written because the author has an abiding love for the works of J R R Tolkien. The characters, settings, places, and languages used in this work are the property of the Tolkien Estate, Tolkien Enterprises, and possibly New Line Cinema, except for certain original characters who belong to the author of the said work. The author will not receive any money or other remuneration for presenting the work on this archive site. The work is the intellectual property of the author, is available solely for the enjoyment of Henneth Annûn Story Archive readers, and may not be copied or redistributed by any means without the explicit written consent of the author.